Currently, I do provide care to a proclaimed atheist. Before I discuss how I provide spiritual care to an atheist, let me reiterate a point about spiritual care: spiritual care goes beyond just religious care (read The Mission of the Chaplain). While the two are connected, they certainly are not exclusive of one another. In my experience, a person can be spiritual without being religious and religious without being spiritual. Spirituality includes a wider range of activities in our life. I often explain spirituality as anything that gives you life. If you think or meditate about those things that you find the most enjoyment in, chances are you are connecting with a part of your spirit. I have found writing to be a spiritual activity, because it helps me to order my thoughts, it helps me to express myself, and it challenges me intellectually. Of course, the list could go on, but the point is spirituality has more to do with the drive to continue to seek out life. Spirituality can also be what gives us a reason to get out of bed in the morning, to go to work, have a family, and want to better ourselves. I have talked to many people, and this desire exists with most of them. Many people connect this drive for life with God.
A gentleman I currently visit with says to me all the time, “I pray to all the gods, I pray to the god that will come to take me away, whichever god that may be.” He tells me he does not believe in a god, but just in case there is he wants to cover his tracks. I never bring up the issue of religion or God with him, but as we sit, him with beer in one hand, and cigar in the other, and I with an occasional coke in my hand, we talk about those things he enjoys the most: gambling, beer, cigars, his work, and sports. I have learned a great deal about gambling from him, so if anybody needs any tips I might be able to help you out. There is always a common theme with the subjects he talks about, however. The “vices” he had were always done with others; with his friends. He looked forward to getting up and going to work, because of the people who were there. This was all a part of his spirituality (although he does not fully realize it yet). Now, I do not condone his behavior, and we have talked about how his vices have caused hardship with himself and his family. But, the direction I do guide him in is to focus on his enjoyment of being with others and talking. As we talk, he is able to open up, get things off his mind, and free himself a little more each time. My hope is that he will continue to realize the importance of communing and discover a gift within himself.
Since spirituality is not exclusively tied to religion, I am able to maneuver in a number of venues without needing to force my particular beliefs on others. I want people to discover for themselves what they believe to be true. God can be found in a number of places and ways. God is certainly not tied to just religion. We don’t have to be in church or synagogue to experience God, God is in our writing, nature, family, self, work, and maybe, just maybe even when we are sitting with one another enjoying a good cigar and beer.
I encourage everyone to not be afraid to love what they love. To deny what you love is to deny a vital part of your spirit. To let go, give in to your spirit will open possibilities beyond your belief.
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3 comments:
I applaud the fact that you are talking with an atheist but not doing so in a way that makes him feel attacked and thus immediately resentful of religion. What do you say to those people who worry that a loved one might not go to heaven because they don't go to church, even though the person in question may still be very thoughtful, generous, and loving?
Great posts, Matt. As a guy that was not raised with religion, but with spirituality, it is refreshing to hear someone associated with a faith recognize the possibility of one without the other. My father was raised in foster care, and his first experiences with religion were with a foster family that happened to be rattle snake-handling holy rollers. Needless to say, he was dissillusioned with the idea of church. Though I never was taught to follow any particular faith, I was constantly questioned as to the nature of man, the morality of our actions, and our purpose for being. I open my spirit to movement everyday.
That being said, I wanted to ask you about the conflicts that arise when the distinction of religious faith and spirituality is not recognized. With the world growing smaller, and the different faiths of the world trying to share spiritual space, how important is this recognition of the non-traditional view of spirituality?
I absolutely love the idea of spirituality not being exclusively tied to religion. My parents worked in the church and I was exposed to it 24/7. However, as I grew up I found that the religion was not for me but remained what you and I would say deeply spiritual.
I truly believe that we better ourselves by talking with others, especially those who view things differently. I have many friends that are religious and many who are not. When topics on spirituality arise, things seem to turn into a simple defense of one's own opinion instead of listening to the other's. I've heard a million ideas on the types of questions religious people should ask those not of the same religion, but what kind of things should a non-religious person ask if they truly want to understand what the other person is about without getting an answer that contain the same key words as every prayer, hymn or Michael W. Smith song?
If for nothing else, I think what you've got here is a great way to bridge worlds that needlessly clash.
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